Thinking Differently
For those of you who have read the previous issue and are coming into this with an expectation, this is what I promised. It may not be what you were expecting!
If you want to change your output, you must change your input. If the map we have been using got us lost, if we are not getting the results we wanted, if we are getting the tangible results, but the intangible part is not what we expected and needed, if we have a problem we can’t seem to solve, then we need to think about things differently. Perhaps it would be better to use a different (more effective) map than to continue to use the one we started our journey with. But here is the challenge: Even if we are already rummaging around in the glove box of our car looking for other maps (yes, I’m dating myself), how will we know that what we pull out will be “more effective” than what we were using? We may know that we need to think differently if we want our results to change, but what does that look like? I am reminded of a quote that is often attributed to Richard Bandler and John Grinder, the developers of NLP:
“If what you are doing isn’t working, do anything else.”
So, I think any map you find (or create) that is truly different is probably “more effective” than what you were using! Invent your own!
“The significant problems we face cannot be solved at the same level of thinking we were at when we created them.” - Albert Einstein.
Everything we experience in Life comes to us through our five senses: taste, smell, hearing, taste, touch. If we were somehow able to disconnect ourselves from all five, we would have no contact with the outside world. It is estimated that we receive approximately 11 million bits of input a second. To think differently, we literally need to organize these sensory inputs differently.
But what also comes to my mind as I am writing this is that the “problems,” to use Einstein’s word, are rarely the problem. Often, they are symptoms. The root problem, the real issue, is usually at a deeper level. Dropping the pursuit of a solution to the problem and digging for the root issue is certainly an example of thinking differently.
Here is another quote regarding the utilization of maps.
“When all’s said and done, all roads lead to the same end. So, it’s not so much which road you take as how you take it. Charles de Lint (1951), Greenmantle.
So, hunting for a perfect or proven map is perhaps not the best use of our effort. When trying to evaluate or consider a different approach, we most often tend to evaluate it in the context of our existing paradigm, our existing map. This is not to say that one should simply head down a dark, muddy, unpaved path with the expectation that it will lead to the yellow brick road. You should have the expectation that such a journey could be a muddy, messy trip and that it may or may not lead you better than what you were doing. But it can. In my life, there was a time when I had a significant collaborative interpersonal challenge. I was trying to build a stronger bond, and whatever I tried seemed to fail and make things worse. I was completely befuddled. I didn’t know what to do differently on a rational, logical, thoughtful basis. So, I decided to try being illogical, irrational and emotional, which I did with premeditated intent. I was reminded of the idea that often the easiest way to move a pendulum toward you is to start by pushing it away. So that is what I did. I pushed the pendulum away, hard. This was, most assuredly, a “different approach!” It was more than a little muddy and messy, but the pendulum then swung back. It took no small amount of courage and there was no guarantee that my approach would work. But one definition of insanity is to do the same thing repeatedly and expect the result to change. I took Bandler and Grinder’s approach and did “anything” else. Not all “different approaches” require a trip down a muddy, messy road, however.
Behind any map we have certain assumptions, presuppositions, things that we take for granted to be true. But the map is not the actual highway. The menu is not the actual meal. They are only simplifications. And sometimes our presuppositions need to be uncovered and reconsidered, questioned, flipped over, because if we find they are no longer serving us, perhaps we have now found the root of the problem and can more easily understand what to change. When we change the presuppositions, the map upon which they are based instantly changes and can perhaps be much more effective. So, what do you take for granted to be true or correct or required that, in this case, actually may not be? Watch what can happen when you come up with answers to that sort of question!
“Awareness is the greatest agent for change.” Eckhart Tolle
When awareness expands, our perception expands. When our perception expands, it is much, much easier to not only uncover our relevant presuppositions but also understand them. In my experience, though, that is not the way it works. When our awareness expands, new, more effective presuppositions just seem to appear, and the map shifts. So, how does one expand awareness? I suppose there may be many opinions on this, each somewhat rooted in different understandings of awareness. Here is mine: Someone once said, “Only awareness can expand awareness.” He went on to indicate that the key to this process is meditation. I’ve written about meditation previously, back in issue 19. When we meditate and our thought processes slow down, the “noise” quiets, and what we are left with is the makings of expanded awareness. Another approach is working with a good coach or therapist. These “guides” ask us questions we don’t realize we need to be asking ourselves. They reveal our blind spots and, discovering those, we have expanded our awareness, and the map instantly looks different.
So, here is a question, “the” question for you: As a result of reading this, what has changed in your awareness? What, if anything, have you learned that you can apply differently in your life? Because that is a necessary step in the process of waking up!
If you found this issue helpful and want to hear more from Greg, be sure to subscribe to his podcast, Pants Around Ankles Prevention, where each episode delivers a punch of truth to help you wake up, gain perspective, and live with greater clarity and purpose. Listen and subscribe now on Apple Podcasts or YouTube.
This issue was originally published by Greg Hayne on Substack.